Reunion
by Summing up the Stars
Summary: AU Shonen ai. CloudRiku. The trials and tribulations of trying to survive a family reunion. slight FF:AC crossover RR


Disclaimer: I own very little, and such talk is the source of my depression. XD

Title: Reunion

Author: Summing up the Stars

Genre: Humor

Rating: T

Pairing: implied/established Cloud/Riku

Authors Note: A/U, Half this idea came from a conversation with Mandi. XD All your fault.

All _italics_ indicate flashback.

* * *

"Choose something you wouldn't give your worst enemy and give me a double."

Cloud looked up and across the kitchen from where he was cleaning glasses and smirked. "Bad day, Riku?"

Riku glared at the blonde, as he sat at the table.

Cloud felt a shiver go down his back, and decided never to piss the other guy off, his glare made a glacier seem warm by comparison.

…….. Must be a family trait.

As he put a glass in front of the currently fuming teen, he decided to risk life and limb.

"So what happened?"

Riku narrowed his eyes. "Family reunion."

Cloud winced. "Ouch."

Riku snorted. "You have _no_ idea."

It was Clouds turn to look incredulous, "I've _met_ Sephiroth, Kadaj, Yazoo, and Loz.."

Riku gave a humourless half grin. "_Sephiroth, Xemnas, Setzer, Fu, Kadaj, Yazoo _and_ Loz_ all at the same time, in the same room, all day long."

Cloud developed a pained look. "You win, and you're drinking too much."

Riku rolled his eyes, "I have brain cells that will remember this evening, and I want them destroyed."

Cloud snickered, but decided it was high time he took that glass away. "Talk."

Riku looked straight at him then sighed. "You just _knew_ it was going to be _such _a_ good_ day…."

_"KAASAAAAAAAAN!" _

_Riku flinched at the ear-piercing yell of his **favorite** cousins._

_Note the sarcasm._

_Riku closed his eyes trying valiantly to stop his eyes' mad twitching, as he slowly started to count backward from 100, he could vaguely remember when he used to count from ten, all the while silently praying that Sephiroth or Fu would just snap and kill the three of them before they reached him._

"_KAASAN!"_

'_I will not scream...I...will...NOT...Scream...' Riku's mantra was rudely cut off as he was suddenly body checked, or what **felt **like a body check, but was probably their version of a glomp._

_Any and all self-control bit the dust._

_"Will you SHUT UP about your 'kaasan' crap and go bug Sephiroth? I-am-a-bloody'-guy! I'm **MALE**! I **CANNOT** HAVE KIDS! AND IF I WAS YOUR MOTHER, GOD FORBID, I WOULD HAVE **DROWN YOU AT BIRTH!"**_

"B-but! Kaasan! Yazoo said eyes watering and lip trembling.

"_But I wanted to play!" Loz said through tears._

"...Kaasan...why do you hate us? Is it because of Sephiroth? Do you love him more than us!" Kadaj asked in a trembling voice.

Riku was tempted to laugh hysterically at that, Sephiroth? Yeah, right. He's just a big ice-brick of love, that one.

"You know," Riku stated once he got himself under control, "whenever I see you three, I realize exactly **'why'** some things eat their young."

_"But kaasan, we'll do anything you ask!" Kadaj said with watery eyes._

_Riku paused,"Anything?"_

_The triplets nodded hyperly, "Anything!"_

_Riku smirked, " Alright. Go kick Sephiroth in the shin."_

" _YAY! We get to play!"_

_Yazoo eyes shined as he nods fervently._

"_Okay, kaasan"! Kadaj said as he grabbed his brothers and ran off to find Sephiroth._

_Riku sighed he didn't think they'd actually do it._

_Exactly two minutes later everyone heard (and most dove for cover), "OUCH! DAMMIT WTF? YOU THREE!" accompanied by the sounds of a sword being pulled out, (Yes Riku's other cousin was **REALLY** weird)" You die **NOW**."_

_Just before all three burst back in and ran screaming, "KAASAAAAAAAN! SAVE UUUSSSS!" behind Riku latch/clinging to him in fear, with Sephiroth close behind them._

_Riku stiffened. That **would **come back to bite him._

_A short while later, a much poorer Riku tried to slow his wildly beating heart. Damn, was Sephiroth scary, but fortunately easily bribed with munny and a tip on an underground weapon tournament._

_Riku 'erked', as he turned to find three pairs of adoring eyes on him._

_"KAASAN SAVED US! YAAAAY!" Kadaj, Loz and Yazoo cried as they jumped around together, just before body checking, I'm sorry, **glomping**, him once again._

_At which point Xemnas, Setzer, and Fu came out of their hiding places just in time to laugh, or in Fu's case smirk in amusement, at Riku's misfortune._

_It was then that Riku started to bang his head against his palm. "Just kill me now..."_

"The sky is falling, you ninny, pay attention," Riku said, bouncing a wadded up piece of paper off Clouds head.

Cloud sniffed and faked pouting, "Fine then, be mean to your caring and worried boyfriend."

Riku raised an eyebrow at him. "You were the one who wanted to know, _and_ you do realize you did the exact same thing to me after _your _last family reunion, right?

Cloud grinned.

"It's been a year already, so you have another next month, if you ever read the mail." Riku finished, smirking, as the grin fell off Clouds face, just before said face collided with the tabletop.

* * *

Finish

* * *

A/N-

Thanks for the help writing this Mandi!


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